A Recipe

I concocted this recipe myself. I would like to state in advance, that this recipe is copyright by me. It may not appear in any publication, nor may it be used to produce food for commercial sale.

I am giving the Small batch version if you just want to give these a go. It is easy to double if you are feeding a crowd (like I am!). I guarantee your friends will want a batch for Christmas! Your boss may barter a raise in exchange for a tin of these! And they will make even the most alien, crotchety mother-in-law smile her thin and meaningless smile.

Bacon "Fattie Snackies"

Prep: chop 2 oz. of bacon and stir-fry until crisp; drain on toweling
Preheat oven to 375 degrees F

Ingredients:

1/4 Cup (4 Tablespoons) butter, softened
1/2 Cup peanut butter (smooth or crunchy, you pick)
1 egg
3/4 Cup Sugar
1/4 Cup Brown Sugar
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 pinch of salt (1/8 teaspoon)
1 Cup all-purpose unbleached flour
1/2 cup mini chocolate chips
crumbled bacon (lardons)

Cream butter, peanut butter, egg, and sugars with a wooden spoon until they are homogenous. Add leavenings (baking soda and salt) and the flour. Stir in chocolate chips and bacon. Place ping-pong ball sized lumps about 2" apart on ungreased cookie sheets. Bake 8-9 minutes. Drop cookie sheets onto counter or stove top from about 6" height to collapse cookies. Cool on racks or waxed paper. Try to wait until they are cool before you eat them.

WARNING: Newly-baked cookies are HOT! I cannot be held responsible for ensuing burns to the lips or tongue just because *you* don't have any self-control. (LOL)

Oh, So You Want the Recipe for Lentil Soup!

Ok, here it is. Very cheap soup to make for as nutritious as it is. Very yummy for a cold winter night too. Delicious with homemade wheat bread, or go ahead and cheat and get a loaf of Italian bread from the bakery. LoL.

Lentil Soup

one bag lentils (12 oz. or 1#, red or brown doesn't matter)

water

3-4 cloves garlic

one bay leaf

scrap meat of the hammy variety (smoked sausage will do, as will ham, cooked crumbled bacon, turkey smoked sausage, or even turkey. any ol' thing)

a couple carrots, shredded

one chopped onion

salt and pepper to taste

a can (14-16 oz.) of chopped tomatoes if you want them in there

Additionally, you will need:

large soup pot

colander

Start this early in the day or the night before. Put the Lentils in the colander and rinse them. Dump them in the soup pot with enough water to cover them twice their original depth and cook them a little while. Half hour is fine. Turn them off and let them sit a while, a couple hours is fine for this too. Or put them in the fridge overnight and finish cooking them tomorrow after work.

After the lentils have set a while and are looking plump and comfortable, turn the heat back on under them. Throw a couple cloves of crushed garlic in the pot, along with a bay leaf, the shredded carrot, and meat of some sort. Add a little water if the soup is too thick to stir.

Saute the onion in a skillet until it is waxy looking, then add it to the pot of lentils. Cook the stew a little while (maybe half an hour) until it is hot through and rather thick. Just before serving add salt (about 2 teaspoons should be enough), pepper, and chopped canned tomatoes if you want them.

Enjoy!

Two Yummy Recipes

Applesauce Junk Cake

So called because it is Applesauce cake with the freedom to throw in any "junk" you have lying around that you think may be good in cake. After eating this, my son Artemas said, "More hamburger, less cigarette ash" (a joke, my dh used to have an aunt who would bake with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth and the ashes would be in EVERYTHING. LoL)

Cake 1 Cup butter (no sub) 2 Cups sugar 2 large eggs 2 Cups Applesauce (1, 15oz. can is fine) ----- about 3 cups total "junk" (see note to the right) 3 1/2 Cups flour 2 tsp. baking soda 1/4 tsp. salt 2 tsp. ground cinnamon 1 tsp. nutmeg 1/2 tsp. ground cloves 1/2 tsp. ground ginger

Junk Anything you think would be good in cake! I used coconut, crushed almonds,and shredded carrot. You could also use: walnuts or pecans raisins craisins butterscotch or white choc. chips cinnamon red hots (I would then leave out some of the spices) Frosting 3 oz. cream cheese 1 tsp vanilla, dash salt powdered sugar (1 lb. or more) milk if needed for consistency

Instructions:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Grease and flour 2 or 3 round cake pans, 2 9" square pans, or one 13x9x2" pan.

Mix wet ingredients of cake, including sugar. Mix in 2 cups of flour. Add another cup of flour and the leavening (baking soda and salt). Mix in. Toss your 3 cups of junk with the last 1/2 cup of flour. This keeps the bits of stuff from sinking to the bottom while your cake bakes. Mix floured junk into the batter. Pour into prepared pan(s). Bake for 30 to 40 minutes (30 minutes for 3 layers, 35 for 2 layers, probably 40 minutes for one sheet pan). Cake tests done when a knife inserted in the center comes out moist and possibly with crumbs but not gooey.

Mix frosting until it is thick enough to be spreadable and not runny. Frost cake when cooled. I just do the layers and leave the sides plain. Delicious!

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Fattening Potato Soup
This is the BEST potato soup I have ever eaten! Don't let the name scare you off (but probably don't make a steady diet of this stuff either)...

This makes about 3 quarts of soup. Recipe is easily cut in half (or freeze some for another night's dinner). This will warm you inside and out!

10 to 12 good size potatoes, washed, partially peeled, and cut into about 1/2" cubes

3 cloves garlic, crushed

a bay leaf

one large or 3 small carrots, shredded

one onion, chopped

1-2 stalks celery, chopped

1/2 pound bacon, cut small, fried, and drained of grease

salt and pepper to taste

8 oz. sour cream

about 8 oz. shredded cheese (your choice)

Put chopped potatoes, crushed garlic, bay leaf, and shredded carrot into a soup or stock pot, cover with water and boil until potatoes are tender.

Fry bacon pieces and set aside. Use a little bit of the bacon fat to saute the onions and celery until they are translucent and tender. Add bacon, onions, and celery to the soup pot.

I take some of the potatoes out and mash them and put them back in. If soup is still thin, make a roux with 2 T bacon fat and some flour and stir into the soup to thicken. Salt and pepper soup to taste.

Just before serving, stir in the sour cream. Serve topped with shredded cheese. Good with a slab of toasted Sourdough bread too.

Homemade Craft Dough Ornaments

This craft dough is so easy to make and fun to play with, you may never want to use store-bought again!

NOTE: make sure your kiddies know NOT to eat this stuff! One of my 4 year olds once ate some while I wasn't looking and promptly threw up all over the table. It may look pretty and smell nice, but make sure they know it is yucky!!

Ingredients:

1 Cup Flour

1/2 Cup salt

2 teaspoons Cream of Tartar (this is sold in the spice section of your supermarket)

2 teaspoons oil

1 Cup water

optional: colorant (powdered drink mix works well, or just use food colors or paste colors)

optional: fragrance (candle or soap scent oils or food extracts)

Additionally you will need:

cup, 1/2 cup, and teaspoon measure

saucepan

whisk

stiff spoon or spatula

I am making double batches so the saucepan is pictured with some ingredients measured in already. In these pictures I am making strawberry scented craft dough, so along with the required ingredients, I have dark cherry drink mix (1 packet) and strawberry fragrance oil.

Measure the dry ingredients into the saucepan and mix around
with the whisk. Add the oil (and fragrance oil if using) and colorant. While stirring, pour in water. Turn burner on medium heat and cook and stir until mixture thickens and begins to hold together in a ball. Once it begins to thicken, it will thicken up pretty fast!

Turn craft dough out onto a countertop
and let set a minute or two until cool enough to handle. Knead a few times until the dough becomes smooth.

Store in airtight containers for many hours of playtime fun! I recommend using the craft dough on a plastic tablecloth or other protected surface! Just like store-bought play doughs, this stuff does not agree with carpets and upholstery!

We made pale green (apple), white (vanilla) and deep pink (strawberry). We made ornaments out of some of ours. I baked them in a 200 degree oven for an hour or so on each side, turned the oven off and let them cool. If you are going to bake these, make sure they aren't more than about 1/4" thick, or they will not dry all the way through. Dough is also paintable when baked.

CHOCOLATE DECADENCE

Credit
This recipe is from the ultimate dessert cookbook, Cocolat, by the owner of the restaurant of the same name, Alice Medrich. It is out of print. I looked for a copy for nearly 10 years, and the one I finally got cost over $80. If you are serious about baking gourmet-style desserts, it is worth the search. And the money.

This cake will cost (depending on where you live) about $12 to make, plus the raspberry or orange sauce. It is WORTH EVERY PENNY. If the people you serve it to don't swoon in ecstasy, RUN AWAY from those people! Next time serve them the instant pudding topped with oreo crumbs and cool whip, that they deserve.

Ingredients
for cake:

1 POUND of dark (semisweet or bittersweet) chocolate, chopped up small

5 oz (1 stick plus 2T) unsalted BUTTER (NO substitute)

5 large eggs, separated

1 Tablespoon flour

1 Tablespoon sugar

pinch of Cream of Tartar, or 1 teaspoon vinegar
a word about the chocolate: Use the best chocolate you can afford. Ghirardelli or even [gasp!] Nestle chocolate chips or chunks are okay... generic imitation chocolate-flavored chips are not. Your dessert will only be as good as what you put in it.

for topping:

3 to 4 cups whipping cream (NO substitute)

3 Tablespoons sugar
for sauce :

one small jar of Seedless Raspberry Jam or Orange Marmalade

1 ounce (+/-) water

Preheat oven to 425 degrees F

Trace your baking pan onto waxed paper or baking parchment. Cut the shape out. Grease baking pan (or spray with baking spray), line with cutout paper, grease or spray the paper too. Set aside.

Separate egg whites into large grease-free bowl. In order for whites to whip properly, the bowl must have NO trace of oils in it, not even fingerprints!

Place yolks into a small cup.

In a large, microwave-safe measuring cup or bowl, melt chocolate with butter. 2 minutes should do it. Stir until the chocolate mixture is smooth. Alternatively if you don't own a microwave, you can melt the butter and chocolate in a bowl set over barely simmering water in a pan on the stove. Be sure not to get a *single* drop of water in the chocolate if you do it this way! It will ruin the chocolate!

Add the flour and egg yolks (yolks ONLY!) to the chocolate. Stir until blended in, and set aside. (Note, I am using 6 eggs because they are medium size)

Add a pinch of Cream of Tartar or a teaspoon of vinegar to your egg whites. Beat whites with a mixer (or whisk by hand if you are brave!) until soft peaks form. As the whites are beating, sprinkle in the Tablespoon of sugar. Continue beating until stiff peaks form and whites look smooth and glossy... and not a second more!
Caption: Yes, I am a "po" woman with a "cadillac" mixer. A person who uses tools on a daily basis should own high-quality tools. I cook a lot for a lot of people!

fold about 1/4 of the beaten eggs into the chocolate mixture to lighten it.

Add chocolate mixture back to egg whites and fold in gently and continually until mixed.

Pour into prepared pan.

Bake exactly 15 minutes. Cake will rise almost like a souffle and will seem unset in the middle. This is correct!

Cool cake in pan. Cake will sink in the center and seem cracked around the edges. This is also correct!

When cake is cool, run a knife around the edge. Invert cake onto your flattened hand, peel paper off the bottom, and place cake on a large serving plate or platter.

Topping the cake
I see your wheels turning! You are thinking, "I could just SKIP this step and go straight to Cool Whip!" DO NOT even THINK about desecrating the sanctity of this cake with Cool Whip! I will hunt you down like the dog that you are, and cover you with that fake sweet fatness and tie you naked and "whipped" to an ant mound! I swear!

When whipping cream, have the cream as cold as possible. It also helps to chill the bowl and whisk or beaters!

Pour whipping cream into the bowl and whisk or beat on low ro medium speed until soft peaks form. (If you use a higher speed, you can turn the cream into butter! No REALLY! What do you think butter is?)

Gradually sprinkle in 3 Tablespoons of sugar, as you are beating the cream.

STOP beating AS SOON as stiff peaks form. The whipped cream will stiffen further as you spread it on the cake. If you overbeat cream, it will curdle and get watery. Blek!

Spread about 3/4 of the whipped cream on the cake and over sides.

Put the rest of the cream into a pastry bag with large star tip and pipe on top of the cake. Or plop the rest of the cream around on the cake with a spoon and use the back of the spoon to make peaks.

Raspberry or Orange Syrup

Scoop contents of the jar of jelly into a large, microwave-safe measuring cup. Add 1 oz. of water and nuke a minute or two. Stir briskly to thin the sauce. Serve drizzled over the slices of cake.

I cut this cake into 24 slices (1/4, then each 1/4th into 6 very thin slices). When you have a piece, you will see why. It is incredibly rich. Oh and you can inform your low-carb friends that this cake has only ONE tablespoon of sugar and ONE tablespoon of flour in it.