Thursday, February 5, 2009

So What Do I Do With THIS Kid?

A story from last evening and one from this morning already, both about my 22 month old daughter Beverly (aka Betsy).

Yesterday I ordered a firearm from a local gun dealer... a 9mm Bersa Thunder Ultra Compact 14 round in blued metal. Got a great deal too. I left the page from the dealer open so Richie could see it when he got home from work. And since I wasn't going anywhere pressing, I left my debit Visa card on the computer desk.

Just after Richard got home, Artemas saw Betsy over at the computer, clicking and typing and whatever 22 month olds do when they are trying to act like Mommy. He went over and said, "What are you doing?" And she said "Here!" and handed him my debit card. He looked at the screen, and she had actually clicked on a handgun and had it in the site's "cart" and was trying to put in numbers from my card to buy it! LOL!!

When he took the card away and took her off the computer desk chair, she ran into my room, into the top drawer of the nightstand where I put gift cards people give the kids until they get a chance to use them. She got out two cards, brought them to Artemas, and said, "Try!" She REALLY wanted to buy a handgun! ROFLOL!

I have to admit, she has good taste. She had a nickel finish Bersa 45 in the cart to buy. More money than I would like to spend, but babies have no sense of value. LoL.

This morning I got a call from my oldest daughter, Desiree. She said, why did you just send me a text message that said, "You're as bad as Allen"? I told her I didn't send anything... I had been reading to Richard this morning and my phone was out on the kitchen table. She says, it is exactly the message Artemas sent me last week but it just came through a minute ago.

Beverly had been playing with my phone... somehow got into Messages and resent the message in the outbox to Des. I am not sure I even know how to do that.

When Des was 2, she figured out how to work the VCR one day while "we" were napping. (By the way, now that she's a grown-up, you can see Des' wonderful artistic bags at her Etsy shop). At 2, Artemas took off all but his underwear and wandered 6 blocks away from home. Veronica told me when she was 2 that she couldn't go near the pool because it was "very Dangerous." Josiah told me he couldn't eat a play hot dog made of sculpey because it was "poisonous."

What do I do with a kid who can send text messages and buy handguns online with mom's card when she isn't even 2 yet? I think I need to go lie down.

4 comments:

SunshineofAutumnQuilts said...

I am so glad I am not the only one with a house of kid geniuses!
Simply Hilarious!

Mommab@sbcglobal.net said...

This is too funny!!! Barbie at age 20 months was reading labels on VCR tapes and could actually work the darn vcr. You would ask her to go get the Grinch movie (it only had regular printing no pictures on the tape) and she would put it in and with the remote hit play. I was amazed. But ordering online shoot scarey!!! My package arrived today Oh my!!! Thank you so so much, im due for some fun and this is just the ticket!!!!

Lee Purdum Lehman said...

Mercy! Sounds like you need to get offline when you're not at your computer. Back up your data too, if you have important files on there. Oh dear ...... watch your cell bill .... she may've called overseas!! Curious George's need constant watching, don't they? The nice thing about it is that children like that're like sponges. They learn so quickly!! Good luck, and God bless Betsy!!

SleightGirl said...

Maybe she could get a job at Apple...With Steve Jobs not showing up to events, I think there's an opening...lol